March 15, 2008
Hey guys,
Just got back from two long days of poker that had me busting early and busting horribly to some awful bad beats… That’s the name of the game and I can handle it but it sucks to go on one of the slumps, I’ve heard about them but never experienced an all out long-term poker drought so to speak. It seems every time I’m ahead, especially 3-to-1 favorite or better they suck out on the flop or river. Here’s a brief list of the beats I’ve been hit with just in the past 2 days:
JJ (me) vs. 77 (opponent) - Board: A-K-7-4-2
AA (me) vs. 22 (opponent) Board: 2-4-7-J-8
J-10 of spades (me) vs. 88 Board: 8s-3-7s-Qs-Qh
A-J vs. 3-4: Board: A-2-5-7-J
… I think its time for a little break from the tables… I’ll be back at the tables in a few weeks hopefully refreshed and back to my normal form..
-Matty
February 28, 2008
1. Any hand containing a face card most definitely is the nuts, even though you don’t know what “the nuts” means yet, you must certainly will have it. Yeah I know there’s three all-ins and you have jack-deuce, call with confidence!
2. If there is one strength of being a complete donkey it is this: you will not and cannot be bluffed… EVER!
3. Flopping bottom pair definitely is the strongest hand at the table. Call down to the river when everyone else but you knows you’re hopelessly defeated.
4. Even though you have nothing you continue to call bets hoping to get your card on the turn or river. As a matter fact, you call your opponents bet after the river to try to catch your card on the river… but it’s too late and you can’t figure out why your seven high didn’t win.
5. Aces in the hole… No problem, just throw all your chips in the pot right there because you have the best hand in poker. But wait, there’s 5 people to act before you and you just broadcasted to the entire table that you have Pocket Aces… But it doesn’t matter because there’s probably another idiot like you at the table that will call you with king-rag.
6. Two suited cards, you definitely have a shot at a straight here. Yes you still think five suited cards is called a straight but it doesn’t matter because you’re definitely going to hit it. Even with a rainbow flop you call any bet because god willing you will hit your “straight” on the river.
7. Ace-deuce off-suit is definitely a premium hand. Call any and every bet you face because even if you miss the board your ace-high is definitely superior.
8. Get excited and gitty any time you look down at King-Four offsuit under the gun. You don’t know what under the gun means nor have any concept of table position but it doesn’t matter because you have a FACE CARD!
9. Call all the way down with A-K even when you have nothing just because A-K is a good hand and you feel like you should win with it every time because its one of the few hands you know that you should raise with.
10. You have a flush or a gut-shot straight draw, this definitely is better than anything and a favorable situation for a donkey. Call all the way down and then if you miss and face a bet after the river just call anyway. Who knows, your straight or flush draw might be good. Right?
Congrats you are now a certified Poker DONKEY.
WARNING: This story is found on a variety of social networks (sweet!) so I should keep up on entertaining my fellow poker enthusiasts by offering you guys other viewing options:
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Donkey’s please get poker coaching here
January 28, 2008
So I played a tournament tonight at the place that got me started. Was card dead for most of the night and got wittled away by blinds after sitting tight and picking up a few small to mid-sized pots… So blinds are at 50/100 and I’m sitting on 10-15bb and need to make a move pretty soon. I pick up Q-8s on the big blind, garbage but I checked my option and flopped top pair, flop was J-8-4. I move all-in which was close to 2x the pot and get called by under the gun who was holding 5-4o. Not only did he call under the gun with 5-4o but he calls an all-in with bottom pair. Turn comes another 4 giving him trips and I am eliminated from the tournament… I was like are you serious man, 5-4o under the gun, I could understand if it was suited and you were in the blinds or on the button maybe but under the gun then calling an all-in with bottom pair when also being priced out is terrible….
This is the second worse under the gun idiotic play I’ve got donked out of tournaments from, the worst was I had J10 in BB and UTG called with J-4o and we both flopped top pair and he spiked a 4 on the river and crippled me early…
Note to players that play garbage in early position: Read the starting hand requirements section please.
January 18, 2008
So the past two tournaments I’ve played in have landed me eliminated when I tried to chase off flush drawers offering them less than 1.5-1 odds to call, obviously players with no concept of pot odds. The first was at an annual tournament where I limped in late position with A-10 and the small blind called with 8-6 of diamonds. The flop comes Ad-Kd-8s… The girl with 8-6 bets minimum and the big blind folds. I figure she’s on a flush draw or has a lower ace so I reraise her minimum bet of 800 to 3000; pricing her out of the pot. She goes over the top all in for my last 2500 I believe and I call being pot committed and she spikes her diamond on the turn… Yes its poker and I induced a beautiful theoretical mistake and got punished for it but thats not the point, its a rant for you to enjoy…
The next one a few days later I have pocket kings and the flop comes 4h-2h-2d I believe the flop was. I had the king of hearts, I raised 3x big blind… I move all-in because I was relatively short-stacked and had two callers of my raise so the pot was big enough for me, I get called by the small blind who called my raise with 8-10 of hearts, figures… one of those players that calls any raise if they have any money invested in the pot… The idiot gets his heart on the turn and I’m gone, kings cracked by 8-10 suited, a hand I wouldn’t be that surprised to see in a limped pot, but in a raised pot at a table that doesn’t include Gus Hansen; I was unpleasantly surprised… I hate people who have no concept of starting hand requirements or cant fold their freaking crappy draws.
That is all, I promise I won’t rant too much… I must provide insight also….
Donkies and people who don’t know what the hell you’re doing, like the two people described above… visit http://www.mega-poker.net/startinghands.php to learn a thing or two…
-The M
